Jul 14, 2020

What Is Really Causing Our Kids Big Emotions - With Danielle Bettmann

"While we need to look out for our children’s physical health during this time, we need to give the same amount of vigilance to their emotional and mental health as well." - Danielle Bettmann

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Danielle Bettmann | Michelle Hagen | The Busy Years Podcast

If you’ve been a parent for long, you’ve probably realized that it’s not an easy job. There’s not a lot of glamour, but there sure is excitement. #hotmessexpress You’ve more than likely faced sleepless nights and tantrums and meltdowns that have left you reeling from whatever it is your child just went through. More often than not we’re wondering, “What the heck just happened and how do we get off this rollercoaster ride!?” Can you relate? Figuring out how our child is feeling and dealing with their emotions is a big challenge, but it’s one we thankfully don’t have to face alone.

In this episode we’ll chat with Danielle Bettmann, a mama of 2 who started her own Parent Coaching business, Wholeheartedly in 2019. She uses her skills and training as an early childhood educator to come alongside other parents and encourage them in their goals of providing what’s best for their kids. She shares about why it’s important to connect with our kids on a deeper level so as a family we can develop problem solving strategies when faced with big emotions. We dive into some tips and resources we can use as parents to help set our kids up for success when their emotions start to take over.

In this conversation, we talked about:

Understanding that meltdowns, tantrums and outbursts are a symptom of a deeper problem than they are the problem itself
How to connect with our kids on a deeper level to understand what is going on in their head and why they feel so out of control
Going below the surface level emotions and digging into the root problems
Taking a family inventory by rating all areas of life to get a bigger picture of anything that could be a contributing factor or missing link to figure out where to start problem solving
Honing in on triggers of negative behavior and then working backwards to find solutions
Leading by example by labeling our emotions, talking about why we’re frustrated, apologizing when we need to and normalizing the emotions we feel
How Covid has affected our emotional, developmental and mental health
Remembering to give our children grace and encourage them authentically so they feel safe and secure

Quotes I loved in this conversation:

As parents, we have to empathetically understand our kids and problem solve with them so we can help eliminate behaviors.

We as parents can be our kid’s biggest learning board by the way we lead by example.

The biggest thing we can actually control is not our kids’ reactions, but our own.

While we need to look out for our children’s physical health during this time, we need to give the same amount of vigilance to their emotional and mental health as well.